Category Archives: Chrome Hoof

Chrome Hoof

Chrome Hoof are a UK ‘experimental orchestra’ …or ‘prog doom army’… or ‘glam clad death disco’. Ok, what they are is Leo and Milo Smee, and up to ten other people, and a sight and sound to behold. They are a genuine fusion of driving oldschool disco and ‘Attahk’-era Magma, with added twists and excursions (and a fantastic lead voice, Lola Olafisoye). Three worthy albums stand up by themselves (Chrome Hoof, Pre-Emptive False Rapture, and Crush Depth) and their live outings are truly memorable, a rampant ritual of glitter cloaks and mass musicianship. As for the meaning behind this titanic effort, some band philosophy… well, there’s this:

The Trans-dimensional Warlock was besieged with regret over the terror he had wrought since the dawn of matter. Why was his task thus: Seek harmony- only to crush, or the non-allowance of space gasses to coalesce into a more supportive medium- where life may eventually thrive. To slice through the happy union between co-dependant galaxies- rendering them to drift eternally into darkness, and never again find the only compatible ‘bed fellow’ that existed within their allotted Octoverse.(no independent method of propulsion had yet been granted to the common galaxy at this point)
His means were almost limitless, and his drive to professionalism was tantamount to cosmic insanity. His work had no end- but there was a beginning…the sweet sanctuary of being a chef at a central London Steakhouse. This was a concept borne way before even light and dark had begun bickering. The memories were faint, but had been becoming more frequent in the last few billion Avon’s. He once knew another life, before the misery factory that he had become.

The Hoof have been quiet for a few months; a mysterious messenger has beamed aetheric messages into my third ear saying that they are neither sleeping nor dead but Up To Things… things that take time…

In the meantime here’s where you can get their music and here’s some examples to feast your eyes upon:
And another good ‘un – and see if you can spot a certain member of Knifeworld / Cardiacs / Guapo being fully absorbed into Hoof mayhem…